Like, gag me with a spoon!

. Children, Daily Prompt, Empathy Journal, Family, High School, Teenagers . , , , ,

ImageThe younger generation – more specifically, my teenage daughter – has me stumped. Because she does things that simply don’t make sense. And it frustrates me well past my usual state of composure. (Yes, believe it or not, I am a fairly composed person – really – I’ve worked on it over the years and as of late tend to remain reasonably calm even when provoked.) And I try, like many parents these days, to be a card carrying member of the “Pick Your Battles” and the “Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff” clubs but sometimes, it’s the little things that make me sweat the most. That makes my insides boil to the point of combustion – literally. And I hate that feeling – because when I am mad or upset with my children, I inevitably end up being disappointed in myself. I know. I know. That in itself is probably a Dr. Phil issue but it’s not where we’re going here – not today at least.

Now I’m sure that in all my attempts to perfect the valley girl persona I tried desperately to mimic when I was a teenager (yep, I really did used to say things like “Gag with a spoon”) that I did a few things that sent my own mother off her rocker, but I don’t remember being blatantly disrespectful or dim-witted, if you will. If my mother said “no”, then “no” was the answer. And I didn’t feign the “Wait … what … what do you mean? What are you talking about?” disposition either. At least that’s the way I remember it and since my mother doesn’t read my blog, that’s what I’m going with here.

Point being, I’m finding it increasingly difficult to have a whole lot of empathy for the generation that seems to hold an innate sense of entitlement without having to work for it – and yes, I know, I am one of the guilty ones that has perpetuated this – if they didn’t like what was for dinner, I made them something else. When they were the ripe old age of 10, they got an iPhone. The list goes on …

And so, while this isn’t a Monday (I’m drifting from my 2014 Monday Empathy Journal already) the topic at the Daily Post happened to match my thoughts – not to mention my search for a more empathetic year. And so today – when my daughter gripes about dinner, refuses to talk about school, soccer, her latest post Instagram, leaves a pile of dirty clothes at the top of the stairs and steps over it 15 times – I will look at her with the love that I have for her, the deep, deep love and try my best to squash the tendency to give in to frustration. I will be empathetic, not only because she is my daughter, but because she is a member of the younger generation – because she is young. And that in itself can be frustrating enough for them, let alone me.

Now you go have like a totally awesome day -

This post is ENTRY #3: 2014 EMPATHY JOURNAL – inspired by The Daily Post: Generation XYZ. “Think about the generation immediately younger or older than you. What do you understand least about them — and what can you learn from them?”

Baby Penguins and Hollandaise Sauce

. Cooking, Daily Prompt, Movies . , , , ,

ImageMonday, I wrote about outcomes – or more specifically, I begged the idea of what would happen if we worried less about outcomes, and instead focused on the process, or the route we take towards our desired result. Today, after being posed the question – “Tell us about a time when things came this close to working out but didn’t. What happened next? Would you like the chance to try again, or are you happy with how things eventually worked out? – I can’t help but drift off to the strange but wonderful land of French cooking (I know – you were expecting something deep here, but if you humor me and read on you might actually want to read Monday’s post too – and that my friends is where all the deep stuff is).

A few years ago my mother in law gave me Julia Child’s “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” (Slight sidebar here … I know what you’re thinking – that it was a hint about my cooking skills, or lack there of – well you are wrong. I am a good cook – really. I think the gesture was based on the fact that I loved the movie “Julie and Julia” … at least that’s what I’m going with …) So I, not unlike Julie made my way through a good portion of the book – skipping, of course the Aspics and a few other areas that wouldn’t go over so well at my dinner table, or most anyone’s in the Midwest. And alas, I found myself stumped by the ever mysterious hollandaise family. I know, I know … restaurants make it look so easy – you’d think the damn sauce came in a can the way they slather it on eggs Benedict, steamed asparagus, etc. etc. etc … Continue reading →

And we’re off to see the wizard –

. Empathy Journal, Failure, Inspiration, Truth . , , , , , ,

Image“I don’t believe in failure. It is not failure if you enjoyed the process.” ~ Oprah Winfrey

2014 Empathy Journal, Entry #2: Monday, January 13

OK. I started this empathy journal one week ago and I’m already criticizing myself for not having an entry up first thing this morning. For not having anticipated Monday. For not making plans and writing this post days ago. But! But … that is exactly what this is supposed to be about – finding some form of acceptance for our own (as Mr. Emerson said) blunders.

So this morning, I heard a song – I don’t know what it’s called, nor who performs it … its soft and a man’s voice talks during the instrumental part. He poses the question: “What is enlightenment” – he breathes loudly … exhales and continues … he talks about letting go of a lifetime of judging himself and eventually, he suggests we all try to stop focusing on outcomes … Continue reading →

My future in Friday Night Lights

. Children, Daily Prompt, Football, Future, High School, Imagination, Inspiration, Sports . , , , , ,

Image“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

The future is scary. But its promise is also exciting. I never used to like to think about the future, even though I did – probably far too often. I think people can get stuck worrying about what will happen when what they should be concerned with, is what is happening. Of course the age old wisdom of just about anyone over the age of say, fifty, is that we shouldn’t harbor over the past nor live only for our future because, well, you know that saying, “treat the present as a present” … because it is. Still, it’s not an easy thing to do. Somewhere in there is a happy medium – as for me, I try and live like Mr. Emerson … and while his idea, I think, wasn’t intended to suggest a compete disregard for past blunders, it does, however, give you a blank canvas for tomorrow, and sometimes that can be just as great a gift as the present itself. Continue reading →

Finding empathy even for the difficult ones –

. Blogging, Empathy Journal, God, Inspiration, Politics . , , , ,

nelson mandela“It never hurts to think too highly of a person; often they become ennobled and act better because of it.” ~ Nelson Mandela

2014 Empathy Journal, Entry #1: Monday, January 6   

It goes without saying that it is easy – or much easier – to have positive thoughts for people whom you already think highly of. For people that you love. People that you hold close to your heart. People, that you would walk to the ends of the Earth for – say your children. But what about the more difficult people? I’m not referring to the ax murderers of the world … I’ll leave those for God to deal with … but what about the irritating people? The ones who cut you off on the road. The ones that sit right in front of you in the movie theater regardless of the multitude of other open seats. The ones that won’t stop chatting it up with the clerk at the grocery making it next to impossible to pay for your broccoli and leave already. Or the ones – yes, you know where I’m going with this if you know me at all – the ones that chew their gum as if it were their last meal on Earth. What about the irritating folks who leave you feeling exasperated after even the shortest contact … is it possible to have empathy for them? To, gulp, as the late Nelson Mandela suggested, “think highly of”? Continue reading →

SURPRISE – two percent milk didn’t kill me!

. Daily Prompt, Running, Workouts . , , ,

ImageI have always lived a fairly regulated life – well, maybe that’s not entirely true. I mean there were those first ten years where I lived as I wished … meaning I ate when I was hungry (imagine that), slept when I was tired, and with the exception of the occasional chore or school project I didn’t want to do, I lived as I wished. But once I got a little bit older, something clicked in my brain and I started thinking too much – way, way too damn much.

By the time I was in my twenties, I lived a fairly regulated life – I’d of made a hell of a good soldier – I think. I ate the same thing for breakfast EVERYsingle day – if I traveled, it came with me. If I went to a restaurant, again, it came with me and I’d sit, with my chocolate Powerbar and desperately try to ignore the occasional whiff of baked goods, of syrup, of sautéing frittatas … those people were week … they had no directive – at least that’s what I told my brain, or the voice preempting my dedication … Continue reading →

Empathy for 2014

. Blogging, Change, Daily Prompt, Inspiration, New Years, People, Thinking . , , , , , ,

ImageI’ve never been big on New Year’s resolutions. I’m more of a Monday girl – you know, Mondays are the start of a new week and as there are 52 of them throughout the year, I sort of figure why not let Mondays be the day to turn over a new leaf … or let an old one drift off with the wind for that matter.

There’s a lot of talk this time of year about losing weight, drinking less, working out more … even reducing debt, being more charitable, more introspective, more forgiving, more passionate, more in-the-present … all good ideas – no, great ideas, but also all things we should give attention to during the entire year not just during the month of January (hence, my aforementioned Monday decree). And sometimes, I think knowing that January first is around the corner gives us leeway over the Holidays (think Christmas cookies, Thanksgiving turkey, Halloween treats) to overindulge … eat too much, spend too much, drink too much, procrastinate too much.

January is our scapegoat. Our liberator – our redeemer. And I suppose that’s a good thing because God knows we humans need one. But why January? Why not Mondays?? Continue reading →