The Art of Chewing Loudly

he Art of Chewing Loudly

Anyone that knows me, knows I harbor some serious resentment towards people that chew gum as if it was their meal on Earth. But because you can read about that here, I’m going to bypass the whole synthetic rubber topic and focus strictly on The Art of Chewing Loudly – sort of sounds like a book title, doesn’t it?

 

Here’s the thing, I get that certain foods are going to be louder to chew than others (and no, I’m not suggesting everyone eat nothing but oatmeal) but, IF you are going to eat something crunchy, could you at least close your mouth? God gave you a nose – please, use it to breathe while chewing loudly.

 

What? Have I offended someone? Oh, come on – seriously? Look, I’m sorry to be the one to break it to you, but I promise, your friends and family will be happier for it. Yes, I’m having one of THOSE days …

 

Why don’t we STRIVE for excellence always?



“It seems that every life form on this planet strives toward its maximum potential…except human beings. A tree does not grow to half its potential size and then say, “l guess that will do.” A tree will drive its roots as deep as possible. It will soak up as much nourishment as it can, stretch as high and as wide as nature will allow, and then look down as if to remind us of how much each of us could become if we would only do all that we can.” Jim Rohn – Five Major Pieces To the Life Puzzle

 

Just a little something for y’all to think about this Monday – now, go do something great … and whatever you do, make sure you surround yourself with at least five people you enjoy, admire, even envy, a bit. Let them inspire you to be great.

 

Today’s post inspired by The Daily Prompt: Circle of Five – Awriter once said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” If this is true, which five people would you like to spend your time with?

 

Nothing Compares to a First Kiss – or does it?



There is nothing that compares to a first kiss. OK. Wait a minute … now that I think about it, some first kisses can suck (no pun intended) – but even the crappy ones have the same level of anticipation. That heart-pounding, belly-twisting, nervousness that makes your body shake at the mere thought of it. That’s the feeling I’m talking about – that’s the one that’s nonpareil.

But there are other things that can cause a rush of adrenaline to shoot through your very core. For some people, it could be public speaking. Remember that first speech you gave in middle school? For others it might be crossing a bridge, or looking out windows of a tall building, or heck, maybe Girl Scouts (I mean those little heathens and their cookies can make anyone a little nervous.)  Or maybe it’s boarding an airplane, or a cruise ship – I mean have you been watching the news? Did you see Titanic? I’m just sayin’.


Either way, whatever causes adrenaline to escape from its safe little hideaway inside your body, it’s different for everyone. Not everyone starts sweating when they see a full box of Thin Mints just like not everyone stresses out before flying the friendly skies. But, I would almost guarantee that everyone’s felt that fight or flight response before a first kiss. Too bad we can’t bottle it.


Today’s post inspired by The Daily Prompt: Fight or Flight – write about your strongest memory of   heart-pounding, belly-twisting, nervousness. And yea, yea, I know. I took a hiatus … believe it or not, I had to visit some relatives on Mars and well, I sort of got lost on my way back … and since they don’t have the internet there so I couldn’t post. But I’m back now – you are so excited.

Calling all Ghouls and Goblins back out of storage …

olafOK people – now I could rant on and on about how some retailers started playing Christmas music October 31st and even had the audacity to remove their leftover ghouls and goblins and replace them with stupid cutsie little elves and reindeer, but alas, I will not go there – Nope. I won’t. I mean it’s annoying and all (SIDEBAR, if everyone – or at least most consumers I know complain about the early onset of holiday commercials and decorations and such, why is it that retailers continue to ignore us?) but I get it. Retailers are just that. Retailers. And they’re in the business of selling things so hey, why not put a little pressure on us sooner than later. I mean how many people bought Halloween candy the end of September because it was on the shelf, only to find it devoured by mid October and have to buy it again, and maybe, just maybe, even again after that??

But, moving on, this post isn’t about vendors or even the all mighty purchasing power we consumers hold – no this is really just a simple call to action … HERE, HERE, oh how I wish those leftover ghouls and goblins would rise from the confines of their respective deep storage bins and quietly swoop in and remove the jack o’lanterns that still seem to adorn the porches of some seemingly confused individuals.

I mean I don’t get it? Surly the trash company has visited your neighborhood at least twice since Halloween. Surly you are aware that it is time to move on to the next round of holidays – I mean haven’t you heard Bing Crosby? Haven’t you? (SIDEBAR, note this is not a request to go Griswold and put up the sleigh and eight tiny reindeer yet – if you could hold off another week or two I’m sure our forefathers and their pilgrim friends would appreciate a little acknowledgement for once.)

Well, anyway, just a little something that’s been on my mind … oh, and to those of you that have painted your pumpkins white and made Olaf statues out of them, kudos – although I think I’ll wait for the real stuff before I make any snowmen … which I hear is on the way … fortunately, the cold never bothered me anyway. (Throw me a bone here people, tell me you got that one??!!)

Today’s post inspired by The Daily Prompt: Ready, Set, Done. “Our ten-minute free-write is back for another round! Tap away on whatever comes to mind, no filters attached. (Feel free to edit later, or just publish as-is).” Also in conjunction with November’s NaBloPoMo

Some days you have it, some days you don’t …

The_Thinker“It’s nice to be wanted. To be longed for, at that …”

OK. Wait. Sorry Daily Prompt, but I simply can’t adhere to today’s theme and write a post as if my coffee cup was the one doing the writing/talking. I can’t … my mind isn’t working right this morning. You know how some days you have it and some days you don’t? Well, today I most certainly do not and while my melancholy and overall crappy spirits are due in part to my lack of caffeine consumption, there’s a much a bigger issue causing my brain to throb. Continue reading

Dear Coffee Cup, Thank you for never talking back …

Pay IT: Forward or Not Just PAY ... unless you forgot your wallet!“Thank you.”

“Thank you for always being there, for always listening, for always being the one I can count on to brighten my mornings, energize my afternoons … but most of all, I thank you for not talking back when I say stupid things, when I think ridiculous things, when I threaten to switch to green tea and shelf you for eternity. For all these things I thank you – and I’m so happy to have had this opportunity to let you know how I really feel.” Continue reading