My Great Aunt has one of these on her toilet. Myself, I have yet to actually see it but my mother swears it exists and her tall tale of woe from her last visit was enough to ensure that a.) I would voluntarily have a catheter inserted before visiting or b.) again, voluntarily, agree to piss outside in the middle of her driveway … even it means I’d have to drip-dry. Yes. Yes. I did agree to drip dry rather than sit my hiney on one of those furry seats.
BUT. (No pun intended – really – I swear!) Here’s the thing … today – probably a good 4-5 times, I have (gulp) secretly wished my toilet was covered with one of those furry seats.
It is cold here. Like freezing. And yes, we have a thermostat and a wood burning fireplace but it’s still cold – the high was around 25 degrees and the low, with wind-chill, around four degrees – awesome! Anyway, the porcelain toilet seats are so God damn cold that I can’t hardly bear it … I can’t even stand to sit on my hands and pee …
OK. I know. Nobody wants to know about anyone else’s bathroom woes but in all seriousness this isn’t a woe-is-me tale … consider it more of a quest to find someone who wants to go into business and fund a macrobiotic, NO GERMS LEFT BEHIND, toilet seat cover – preferably a warm fuzzy one.