The Bottom of a Rabbit Hole …

Ever have one of those days when you think—no, you don’t think … you KNOW, that although you’re pretty sure you’re awake, you could swear that you’re not. Because THIS cannot be real. Just the other day everything was fine … 

Sometimes time passes without so much as an acknowledgement

The other day, as it turns out, was actually nine months ago. So for the past nine months I’ve been living in a fog because like I said, THIS cannot be real. Just the other day everything was fine …

If you stop by here often then you probably know these two things:

  1. I have a tendency to be a tad bit sarcastic,
  2. and two, I used to be (glory days) a competitive runner and have fallen (literally) off the wagon (or the road) due to a few injuries and I’m really REALLY pissed off.

Because nine months ago I felt good, I looked good, I was good. I had the fucking world by its horns, but then I fell … stumbled (metaphorically) across a rabbit hole, peered in, and eventually slid headfirst down, down, down … and I hear I sit. 

The good news, there is still a little light peering in from above so I know I can climb out, but the bad news … unless the good witch waves her wand and a pair of ruby slippers miraculously show up on my feet, it’s going to take some time and a lot of dirt under my fingernails to climb backup. (And no, I’m not entirely ready to discuss the underlying reasons why I fell down the dam hole in the first place let alone why I stayed.)

I know, I know, it could be worse. Yes, yes … things can always be worse. Always. But this is all in my control. I let my physical limitations dictate my mental well being and it took me nine months to figure it out. 

  • Instead of seeing the atrophy, watch and appreciate the muscle rebuild
  • Instead of berating myself for limitations, celebrate the advancements
  • Instead of loathing my body for not being able to run a 7-minute mile, thank it for walking a 14-minute mile

The power of positive thinking … it might be powerful, but it’s hard. Hard as shit. But today I climb … there’s a little shelf a few feet up and maybe, if I dig my fingers into the muddy walls of this rabbit hole, maybe I can get to the shelf in a few days. Maybe then I’ll go get a manicure and instead of focusing on how far I still have to climb, I’ll be happy for how far I’ve come. Maybe. Stay tuned.

How about you? You ever find yourself down a rabbit hole and wonder just how the hell you got there?

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DISCLAIMER: I’m a writer and an editor. And I try my best to make sure every post is articulate and free from errors. However, being that I edit my own work—and it’s next to impossible to properly edit your own work—I admit, occasionally there may be an error or two I miss. But doing so doesn’t make me an idiot so don’t be mean. Just smile, pat yourself on the back for finding an error and be glad you’re not the only one who makes mistakes sometimes … xoxox


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