I HAVE A REQUEST … to all the parents of a cute-pixie-haired (or pony-tailed) daughter donning one of those green uniforms—you know, the ones with sashes covered in patches that read “Junior Crafter” or “Cadette Woodworker” or “Senior Locavore” … could you please, restrain them from bombarding me with requests to purchase cookies when I’m just trying to get a gallon of milk?
Grocery shopping isn’t something I thoroughly enjoy. And, this time of year I cringe when I see a table set up in the vestibule at the Piggly Wiggly covered with boxes of Thin Mints. Mind you, it’s not because I have no willpower and fear a single-sitting devouring of a box—or two—(I don’t even like Thin Mints, EGADS!) and therefore don’t want to be suckered into buying any … no, it’s because no matter what I say, no matter how I phrase it, when I smile, nod, say “no thank you,” and safely enter the store, I feel the sharp pain from the dagger that the said cute-pixie-haired-child’s-mother threw at my back.
I used to live on a street where there were SEVEN pixie-haired girls (well, three pixies, four ponytails) who would knock on my door and ask if I’d like to buy some Girl Scout Cookies. OK, OK … four asked, three just handed me the form with a pencil and told me I could pay later. And for years, I always obliged but recently, one of my neighbors shared her Girl Scout Cookie Survivor Guide 101 (hmmm, is there a badge for that?) is to buy one box from every child. “A good guideline,” she said “… keeps everyone happy, including the pocketbook and you don’t play favorites.”
So, you see, cute-pixie-haired-child’s-mother who threw the dagger at my back for not supporting your child, I am not anti-Girl Scout—nor am I trying to be mean, but no matter how delightful a smile your cute-pixie-haired-child tosses my way, I will not be coerced into buying anymore cookies. I WILL STAND MY GROUND … and I will start using one of those grocery delivery services until the stands of Samoans and tables of Tagalongs are safely put away until next year. (Although, I did just hear they launched a new flavor this year, Exploremores—a cookie that mimics a rocky road ice cream sandwich. I am doomed.)
Oh, and for all you SUPER-spellers out there, yes, it is spelled cadette (not cadet) when referencing Girl Scouts … from what I can gather, the century-old organization added the word “cadette” to the English language in 1963, specifically to identify members between the ages of 10 and 12. BTW, do you know the Girl Scouts have a badge for Comparison Shopping? Yep. I swear. I can’t make that kind of stuff up.
This is an updated version of what I posted in February 2013 when it had 682 views on day one. Good to know I’m not the only one trying to avoid those little comparison shoppers. Anyway, thought a repost would be in order considering the time of year … best of luck to everyone out there trying not to get suckered in : )
Cover image from Pexels’ free library. What? You don’t expect me to actually take a photo of the table covered with Thin Mints at the Piggly Wiggly, do you?
DISCLAIMER: I’m a writer and an editor. And I try my best to make sure every post is articulate and free from errors. However, being that I edit my own work—and it’s next to impossible to properly edit your own work—I admit, occasionally there may be an error or two I miss. But doing so doesn’t make me an idiot so don’t be mean. Just smile, pat yourself on the back for finding an error and be glad you’re not the only one who makes mistakes sometimes … xoxox



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