Lingering is a sin …
Originally published between 2015 and 2018, this post has been updated but preserves its original publish date as best as possible as content is migrated from the archives of The Flavored Word.
If could snap my fingers, wave my wand, wriggle my nose or click my heels together I wouldn’t implore the powers that be to transport my a double s to Kansas—no offense to those of you who love your Jayhawks, but I’d use my wish for something greater … and no, I wouldn’t cure world hunger or poverty or fix global warming or the economy. I mean, hey, if I do that, what’s left for the politicians to do? Anyway, what I would do is sprinkle enough fairy dust over my fellow humans to thwart prolonged procrastination. In other words, I’d help light a fire under their asses and hope they move forward with their lives in a productive manner.
See I hate lingering. And believe me, I do not throw the word “hate” around lightly. But I hate seeing people waste time when, forgive the coined phrase, time is precious. Think about it for a minute—yes, I am asking you to linger over this thought a second, but once you do, you just might agree. Because lingering, be it in line at the grocery store (stop talking to the checker, I am behind you and I want to leave with my groceries before dusk) … or be it on a particular topic (we’ve already discussed that, please, for the love of God can we agree that a decision has been reached) … or be it on a particular thought, or incident (OK, OK, I know your parents got divorced when you were twelve, and yes, that must have been rough but come on already! You are forty! Stop blaming your parents for your current emotional garbage—it is no longer their fault) … or whatever it may be, it’s usually a waste of time and remember, time is precious.
OH, and while I’m sprinkling my fairy dust, I’d also cure meanness. I do not like mean people. Mean people suck.
Do not yell at the waiter because your steak is cooked incorrectly—it’s an easy fix and you’ll probably end up getting it for free anyway. And, believe it or not, it is NOT the flight attendants fault that there are so many rules to follow while flying the friendly skies and since I for one would like to keep our skies friendly, please, sit you’re a-double-s back down, fasten your f’ing seat belt, and do as you and everyone else has been asked.
Remember the seven cardinal sins? If you’re given the serious task of adding a new one to the list—another trait or behavior you find particularly unacceptable, for whatever reason, what’s sin #8 for you? Why?
Cover image created with Google AI.
DISCLAIMER: I’m a writer and an editor. And I try my best to make sure every post is articulate and free from errors. However, being that I edit my own work—and it’s next to impossible to properly edit your own work—I admit, occasionally there may be an error or two I miss. But doing so doesn’t make me an idiot so don’t be mean. Just smile, pat yourself on the back for finding an error and be glad you’re not the only one who makes mistakes sometimes … xoxox
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