Have you ever been reluctant to tell someone something … comment on a particular situation because the mere uttering of the words you WANT to say, might make it appear as though you think yourself superior? Like at a restaurant for a group dinner (think work-related) and you order wine, you don’t speak up about the menu’s offerings because the person across the table will likely make some idiot remark about how “stuck up” you are. Why is that? Why does a more complex understanding of some subjects perpetuate that kind of response from others? And why, for that matter, should anyone care?
When a plumber talks plumbing, no one tells him he’s acting high and mighty when he drops technical terms. When a tenured teacher talks curriculum standards, no one tells her she doesn’t have a clue or that she’s patronizing. When a painter tells you what sheens are better suited for your home’s interior walls, you don’t call him “the pompous painter.” But, when a friend, a co-worker, an acquaintance, when they pipe up about wine, more often than not people accuse them of arrogance. And sometimes, in a self-effacing sort of way, the “arrogant” one learns to keep their mouth shut and sadly falls victim to Imposter Syndrome. And quite frankly, that simply isn’t fair.
Impostor Syndrome: a psychological phenomenon in which people are unable to internalize their accomplishments. Despite external evidence of their competence, those with the syndrome remain convinced that they are frauds and do not deserve the success they have achieved.
I know someone who grew up in a town that’s geography lends itself to winter sports and he, like so many of his friends growing up, started skiing about the same time he could walk … not all that long ago he made a comment about the skiing—or lack there of—in the South and I heard someone else tell him he grew up more privileged that most. Thing is, that’s simply not true. Because everyone skied where he lived. EVERYONE. Not just the “privileged.” Had the person thought a bit more perhaps they would have realized that the privileged ones were more likely to have learned to surf and scuba dive than ski.
As for wine, I grew up in wine country—arguably surrounded by some of the best wineries in the county—and while some people might find my knowledge disdainful, it is knowledge, and for that, I am unapologetic … especially to the fella who called me a wine snob at the dinner table a few weeks ago after he ordered the, “pee-not-oh-are.” Drink to that!
Have you ever suffered from Imposter Syndrome?
Cover image was taken at one of my favorite wine spots in Walla Walla, Washington—Charles Smith.
DISCLAIMER: I’m a writer and an editor. And I try my best to make sure every post is articulate and free from errors. However, being that I edit my own work—and it’s next to impossible to properly edit your own work—I admit, occasionally there may be an error or two I miss. But doing so doesn’t make me an idiot so don’t be mean. Just smile, pat yourself on the back for finding an error and be glad you’re not the only one who makes mistakes sometimes … xoxox
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